Sunday, April 21, 2024

SUNDAY FUNNIES: HUNGRY FOR SOME JOKES?

Hello Everybody! Koda Canine here, just chilling on the couch on a lazy Sunday afternoon while my people are out and about.
Don't worry. I'll be off this couch in a flash the moment I hear them coming home but I'm hungry. I haven't eaten since I ate the dinner they left me about ten minutes ago.
In the meantime, how about some jokes?

If you're trying to decide what to eat, is that food for thought?

If a Judge asks for something to eat, would that be a court order?

If you serve seafood during a poker game, is it fish and chips?

When you want to relax during a meal, do you have comfort food?

Would you consider missing eggs🥚🥚 stolen or poached?

Do busy people prefer to eat their pizza🍕 in piece and quiet?

If you don't peel the potatoes🥔🥔 for dinner quickly enough, are you a hesitater?

You know your morning coffee is too strong when you're half way to work before realizing you forgot your car.

Has anyone ever computed Pumpkin Pi down to the last digit?
The last crumb, maybe, but still...

OOPS!
Just heard the car pull into the yard so it's time to go folks.

Yes, I stayed off the couch the whole time you were gone.
What do you mean the webcam says otherwise?
That spider is lying!
Oh well...

So on that note♫, take care.
STAY SAFE! 😷
Have a great week and please be back next time for more Sunday Funnies!KC.

Saturday, April 20, 2024

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: APRIL 14-20, 2024: NEWS HIGHLIGHTS

 
WE NEED MORE
GUN RESPONSIBILITY
NOW! 

ALL INEQUALITY HAS TO STOP!

BAN BOOK BANS AND BURNINGS! 
WEAR YOUR MASK😷 WHEN NECESSARY
& BEWARE ANY VERSION OF

APRIL IS JAZZ APPRECIATION MONTH🎷 & GARLIC🧄 MONTH.
APRIL 22 IS EARTH🌍 DAY.
FOR THOSE OBSERVING, PASSOVER BEGINS AT SUNDOWN APRIL 22.
APRIL 25 IS ANZAC DAY FOR AUSTRALIA & NEW ZEALAND, LIBERATION DAY FOR ITALY AND WORLD PENGUIN DAY.🐧
APRIL 26 IS WORLD INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY DAY.
APRIL 27 IS HAIRBALL AWARENESS DAY TO PROMOTE BETTER PET HEALTH.
APRIL 28 IS ARBOR🌳 DAY AND WORLD ASTRONOMY DAY.🔭

AM😷NGST EVENTS AROUND THE W🌍RLD THIS PAST WEEK…
*The COVID state of the world, as of April 20, 2024.

*There are 4/FOUR separate links in the header above.


THE TERRORIST REPORT…
*The Free Choice E-zine does not support terrorism, no matter what the “cause” or alleged “justification”. Thus we will only be posting news items in this section whenever terrorists are brought to justice.

🌐THE CLIMATE CHANGE CHRONICLES…
*April 22 is Earth🌍 Day.
*April 25 is World Penguin🐧 Day.
*April 28 is Arbor Day.🌳

🌌SPACE NEWS…
*April 28 is World Astronomy Day.🔭

😢PASSING PARADE…
*TikTok star Kyle Marisa Roth is no longer with us.
*Dickey Betts of The Allman Brothers Band has passed away.
*Grammy winning singer Mandisa is no longer with us.
*Former professional baseball player and 2004 World Series winner Dave McCarty has passed away.
*Former professional football🏈 player and coach Steve Sloan is no longer with us.
*Former professional football🏈 player turned executive Bill Tobin has passed away.
*TV consultant, producer and screen writer Bob Ellison (numerous credits over a long career) is no longer with us.
*Former professional football🏈 player Roman Gabriel has passed away.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…
CAPITAL CHAOS: JANUARY 6, 2021>AFTERMATH
POLITICALLY…
🗹ELECTION 2024…
THE SUPREME COURT REPORT…
SOCIAL (IN)JUSTICE…
😷THE US VERSUS COVID-19…
IT’S FACT CHECK TIME!
MEANWHILE, IN CONGRESS…
*The House still wants to impeach Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Mayorkas, but even after a distraction, the Senate said “No”. (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
TRUMP’S TRIAL(S)…
*The ins and outs of finalizing a jury. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
ELSEWHERE…
😀AND FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS…

THE PUZLE CORNER: APRIL 20, 2024

 😎FUN FACT
It takes 40 gallons of Maple🍁 Tree Sap to make 1 gallon of Maple Syrup.

RHYME TIME
The clue to something is below, but no matter how long your answer is, each word within it must rhyme. Ready?
🐴Horse Feed?

COMMON BONDS
The items in each subset below have something in common. Do you know what it is?
01. {Dolly Parton, Whitney Houston} and yes we know they are both singing actresses.
02. {Hawaiian, Sicilian}

We’ll reveal all next weekend but for now, let’s open up THE ANSWERS BOX📦 and discover the results from the April 13, 2024 Puzzle Corner.

NUMBER PLEASE
Get ready! We ask the question, but the answer is just a number.
What is the minimum number of pitches in the average Major League Baseball⚾ game?
162. Three Strikes per Out multiplied by three Outs per half inning, multiplied by nine innings and then doubled to account for both teams. Yet 162 would result in a 0-0 shutout tie with no one ever getting on base at the end of regulation play, sending the game into extra innings

REBUS
Something familiar is represented in the image below. Do you know what it is?


Sunday, April 14, 2024

SUNDAY FUNNIES: CELEBRITY CITINGS REDUX

 Hello Everybody! Piper D. Katt here!

Our late friend and mentor Autumn the Puppy used to have this routine where she would post actual celebrity comments and then comment upon the comments in a hopefully comedic way.
It hasn't been done since Autumn crossed the Rainbow Bridge🌈, but I'd like to try my paw at it today.

"I was ashamed of myself when I realized life was a costume party, and I attended it with my real face." ~~ Franz Kafka (1883-1924)
William Shakespeare said "To thy own self be true," so I have absolutely no idea what Mister Kafka has to be ashamed about.

"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect." ~~Mark Twain (1835-1910)
Just because a lot of beings are doing the same thing doesn't always make it right. After all, unless you're the lead dog on the sled team, the view never changes. 😼

"Of course I talk to myself. I’m a good speaker and I appreciate an intelligent audience." ~~ Dorothy Parker (1893-1967)
If you talk to yourself and are rich, some just consider you eccentric.
If you talk to yourself and are poor, some question your emotional state of mind, but if you talk to yourself while holding a cellphone📱, you can confuse them all.

“I wake up in the morning, the first thing I do is look in the obituaries to see if my name is in there. If it is not, I start my day." ~~ George Burns (1896-1996)
The man lived to be 100, so he must have been onto something there.

"But some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again." ~~ author C.S. Lewis (1898-1963)
Although in this case he was probably talking about being a parent and reading them to your children, age is just a number and a question of mind over matter.
If you don't mind, it don't matter.

“Everybody misspells my name.” ~~ Anony Mouse. 
Anony Mouse is a prolific author and commentator. There is a lot accredited to him(?) or her(?) that no one ever takes the credit for.
Considering some of the things Anony Mouse allegedly says and believes, I can see why.

"Because it is so unbelievable, the truth often escapes being known." ~~ Heraclitus, ancient Greek Philosopher.
"When you have eliminated all which is impossible, then whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." ~~  Sherlock Holmes via author Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
"Believe it, or not." ~~ LeRoy Robert Ripley, founder of Ripley's Believe It Or Not.
I think these three go hand in paw. Yet how many out there still believe that the Earth is flat or any of that other silly nonsense?

"ANGRY people want you to see how powerful they are. LOVING people want you to see how powerful you are." ~~ Chief Red Eagle. (1765-1824)
Do you really need a current example of THAT? 😾

So on that note♫, take care.
STAY SAFE! 😷
Have a great week and please be back next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!—PDK.

Saturday, April 13, 2024

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: APRIL 7-13, 2024: NEWS HIGHLIGHTS

 
WE NEED
MORE GUN
RESPONSIBILITY
NOW! 

ALL INEQUALITY HAS TO STOP!

BAN BOOK BANS AND BURNINGS! 
WEAR YOUR MASK😷 WHEN NECESSARY
& BEWARE ANY VERSION OF

APRIL IS JAZZ🎷 MONTH & GARLIC🧄 MONTH.
APRIL 13 IS INTERNATIONAL PLANT🪴 APPRECIATION DAY,
THE PRELUDE TO EARTH🌍 DAY.
APRIL 13 IS THE 50TH ANNIVERSARY OF DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS GAME DEBUT.
FOR THOSE CELEBRATING, APRIL 13 IS ALSO VAISAKHI.
APRIL 14 IS DOLPHIN🐬 DAY.
APRIL 14 IS THE 85TH ANNIVERSARY OF
JOHN STEINBECK’S THE GRAPES OF WRATH.
APRIL 15 IS WORLD ART APPRECIATION DAY.
APRIL 16 IS THE 40TH ANNIVERSARY OF THE ROSE IS ROSE COMIC STRIP.
APRIL 16 IS THE 35TH ANNIVERSARY OF THE DILBERT COMIC STRIP.
APRIL 22 IS EARTH🌍 DAY.

AM😷NGST EVENTS AROUND THE W🌍RLD THIS PAST WEEK…
*The COVID state of the world, as of April 13, 2024.

*There are 4/FOUR separate links in the header above.
*Could Israel versus Iran be near??? (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)

*Even as the Russian airstrikes continue…  (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)

THE TERRORIST REPORT…
*The Free Choice E-zine does not support terrorism, no matter what the “cause” or alleged “justification”. Thus we will only be posting news items in this section whenever terrorists are brought to justice.

🌐THE CLIMATE CHANGE CHRONICLES…
*On the issue of “Forever Chemicals” in American drinking water. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*April 13 is International Plant🪴 Appreciation Day, the prelude to Earth Day.
*April 14 is Dolphin🐬 Day.
*April 22 is Earth🌍 Day.

🌌SPACE NEWS…

😢PASSING PARADE…
*2013 Nobel Prize winning Theoretical Physicist Peter Higgs of the Higgs-Boson Particle is no longer with us.
*Famed Journalist Robert MacNeil (PBS News Hour) has passed away.
*Artist Trina Robbins (numerous credits over a decades long career) is no longer with us.
*K-Pop singer/songwriter Park Bo-ram has passed away.
*Former professional football🏈 player Eric Sievers is no longer with us.
*Drummer Keith LeBlanc (Sugar Hill Gang, NIN, more) has passed away.
*Sound engineer Dan Wallin (numerous films over a long career) is no longer with us.
Documentary creator Eleanor Coppola (Heart of Darkness, Paris Can Wait, more) has passed away.
*Former professional football🏈 player turned actor and accused murderer O. J. Simpson is no longer with us.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…
FEDERAL & STATE INCOME TAX FORMS HAVE TO BE FILED BY APRIL 15.
POLITICALLY…
🗹ELECTION 2024…
*Independent Candidate Cornel West has announced his Vice Presidential running mate. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
THE SUPREME COURT REPORT…
SOCIAL (IN)JUSTICE…
STOP THE SENSELESS VIOLENCE!
😷THE US VERSUS COVID-19…
IT’S FACT CHECK TIME!
MEANWHILE, IN CONGRESS…
*House Republican Mike Gallagher has announced his impending resignation, shrinking the Republican lead even further.
TRUMP’S TRIAL(S)…
*A look at Defendant Trump’s current financial status. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
ELSEWHERE…
*The University of Connecticut won the Men’s Division while South Carolina took the Women’s 2024 NCAA College Basketball🏀 championship title. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
😀AND FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS…
*The NCIS franchise (Los Angeles, New Orleans, Hawai’i and Sydney included) will be celebrating its 1000th episode April 15th with “A 1000 Yards”. The Hawai'i episode that night is aptly entitled "The Next 1000".

THE PUZZLE CORNER: APRIL 13, 2024

 😎FUN FACT

NUMBER PLEASE
Get ready! We ask the question, but the answer is just a number.
What is the minimum number of pitches in the average Major League Baseball⚾ game?

REBUS
Something familiar is represented in the image below. Do you know what it is?



We’ll reveal all next weekend but for now, let’s open up THE ANSWERS BOX📦 and discover the results from the April 6, 2024 Puzzle Corner.

FAMOUS FIRSTS
🥇
Who was DC Comics first superhero?
Doctor Occult by Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster first appeared in New Fun Comics’ sixth issue, dated October 1935; predating by three years the pair’s more famous creation: Superman.

TRIVIA TIME
In what movie would you hear the line: ♫Fine swine. Wish he were mine.♫
The line is from the song “Zuckerman’s Famous Pig” in the Hanna-Barbera version of Charlotte’s Web, released in 1973.

Sunday, April 7, 2024

SUNDAY FUNNIES: KNOCK KNOCK, AGAIN

 Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Koda?
Koda who?
Hello Everybody! Koda Canine here.
It's been quite a while since I've done this last, but I thought I'd try my paw again at telling Knock Knock jokes.
Ready?

Knock, knock.
Who's There?
Ashe.
Ashe who?
Bless you!


Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Nobel.
Nobel who?
There is no bell🔕, that's why I knocked!
What? Did you think you were going to get a prize for answering the door?

Knock, knock.
Please Knock Politely.
Who's There?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in and you'll find out!

Knock, Knock.
Whose there?
Wooden Shoe.
Wooden Shoe who?
Wooden Shoe like to know!

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Little Old Lady.
Little Old Lady who?
I didn't know you could yodel.

Knock-knock.
Who's there?
Tank.
Tank Who?
You're welcome!

Who's there?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Hoot, hoot.
Hoot, hoot, who?
Are you an owl?🦉

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Hawaii.
Hawaii who?
I'm fine. Hawaii you?

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Orange. 🟠
Orange who?
Orange you ever going to open the door!
Of course you should never open the door to an unknown stranger.
I'm just strange, for a dog, but that's besides the point.

So with that Public Service Safety Tip, it's time for me to say take care.
STAY SAFE! 😷
Have a great week and please be back next weekend for more Sunday Funnies!—KC.