Sunday, March 22, 2026

SUNDAY FUNNIES: RAIDER OF THE ROUND FILE (misc. jokes)

Piper D. Katt
 Hello Everybody! Piper D. Katt here!
Every time I've looked out a window today, it's raining.☔😾
Thankfully it's not snow.
I've had enough of that to last my entire nine lives, but isn't there some way to change the channel to more sunny and bright days?
In any event, I've been scratching around all day trying to come up with some decent jokes to tell, but the only source I've found is the dreaded Free Choice E-zine office's "round file".
So here goes nothing.
Ready?

I got thrown out of the local coffee shop for wearing a tee shirt.

What do you call a boomerang🪃 that doesn’t return?
A stick.

When you eat a donut without sprinkles, is that a hard diet?

My laptop keeps singing ♫Water Under The Bridge♫.
The Dreaded "Round File"

I'm the proud owner of Adele computer. 😼

When I was young, I was afraid of the dark.
Now when I see my electric bill, I am scared of the light.

I asked my daughter for a phone book.
She laughed at me and called me a dinosaur, then lent me her phone.
Long story short, the spider is dead, the I-Phone is broken and my daughter is mad at me.

I am really glad cats have nine lives.
It's the only way I'm going to have enough time to accomplish everything I want to do in this universe.

If you were allowed $86400 each day but you had to spend all of it by the end of the day, what would you do?
That is how many seconds there are in a day, and when they are gone, they are gone.
Put your seconds to use.

So on that note♫, take care.
STAY SAFE!
Have a great week and please be back next weekend for more Sunday Funnies when Koda Canine presents his Weekend Pupdate.—PDK.

Saturday, March 21, 2026

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: MARCH 15-21, 2O26: NEWS HIGHLIGHTS

 
WEAR A MASK😷 WHEN NECESSARY
& BEWARE ANY VERSION OF

MARCH IS WOMEN’S HISTORY MONTH.
MARCH 21 IS INTERNATIONAL FORESTS🌲🌳 DAY, WORLD POETRY DAY,
& WORLD DOWN SYNDROME AWARENESS DAY.
MARCH 22 IS WORLD WATER🌊 DAY.
MARCH 23 IS PUPPY DAY.
MARCH 24 IS WORLD TUBERCULOSIS AWARENESS DAY.
MARCH 25 IS THE 205TH ANNIVERSARY OF GREECE’S INDEPENDENCE DAY.
MARCH 26 IS LIVE LONG AND PROSPER DAY, courtesy of Star Trek.
MARCH 26 IS ALSO BANGLADESH’S INDEPENDENCE DAY.
MARCH 29 IS INTERNATIONAL MERMAID DAY.
MARCH 30 IS PENCIL✎ DAY.

AMONGST EVENTS AROUND THE W🌍RLD THIS PAST WEEK…
*The reported COVID state of the world, as of March 21, 2026. But why has there been no data from the United States since January 21, 2025???
*As the 2026 Winter Paralympics came to an end... (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Speculation: Where's Vladimir Putin???
*Speculation: The real identity of Banksy??? The suspect denies being the artist, but how important is artistic anonymity??? (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)

IN THE MIDDLE EAST…
FACT BASED OPINION
*Concerning Israel, Palestine, Hamas, Hezbollah, the Gaza Strip and more. (There are 4/FOUR separate links in this item.)
*Iraqi Women’s Rights advocate Yanar Mohammed was murdered March 2, but the news was only recently announced.
*"Open the Strait or else!"—Trump to Iran March 21.
*Speculation: When will the war end???


THE TERRORIST REPORT…

*The Free Choice E-zine does not support terrorism, no matter what the “cause” or alleged “justification”. Thus we will only be posting news items in this section whenever terrorists are brought to justice through arrest and trial.

🌐THE CLIMATE CHANGE CHRONICLES…
*March 21 is International Forests🌲🌳 Day.
*March 22 is World Water🌊 Day.
ARTIST CONCEPTION

🌌SPACE NEWS...
*Sadly, March 23 is the 25th anniversary of losing the MIR Space Station.

😢PASSING PARADE…
*Iraqi Women’s Rights advocate Yanar Mohammed was murdered March 2, but the news was only recently announced.
*Former FBI Director turned Special Counsel Robert Mueller has passed away.
*Author William C. Dietz (novels in the Bounty, Halo and Star Wars franchises, other books) is no longer with us.
*Actor Matt Clark (many roles from 1958-2014) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Tenor Robert White has unfortunately given his last performance.
*Former professional baseball⚾ player Larry Stahl is no longer with us.
*Actor Tom Georgeson (many roles between 1963-2015) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Martial Arts Master turned actor Chuck Norris has taken his last bow on life’s stage.
*Actor Nicholas Brendon (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Criminal Minds, more) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…



WE NEED MORE
GUN RESPONSIBILITY
NOW!

ALL INEQUALITY HAS TO STOP!

BAN BOOK BANS!


NEXT NATIONWIDE RALLIES SCHEDULED FOR MARCH 28, 2026
POLITICALLY…
ON FOREIGN ISSUES…
FACT BASED OPINION
*THE US IRAN WAR...
*"Open the Strait or else!"—Trump to Iran March 21.
*Counter Terrorism official Joe Kent has resigned over the war, saying "Iran was no imminent threat" and that "Israel pressured the US to go to war." Yet now the FBI is investigating him. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*The Congressional Hearing reviewing the Iran War. National Intelligence Director Tulsi Gabbard testified March 18. On Day 2/TWO... (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
*Did Trump know about Israel's planned attacks on energy plants or not??? (There are 4/FOUR separate links in this item.)
FACTS
*Analysis: The toll of war.
*Analysis: The war, so far, with updates from March 16 and March 19. (There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
*Speculation: When will the war end???
*Speculation: The war's outcome???
THE TRUMP TARIFF TURMOIL AND THE ECONOMY…

ON IMMIGRANT ISSUES…
ON DOMESTIC ISSUES...
*The Trump/Republican regime plans to establish an official fraud hunting bureau as they declare a War on Fraud, unless you're a pardoned ally. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
FACT BASED OPINION
THE 2026 MID-TERM ELECTIONS…
*Analysis: What voter fraud???
*Analysis: The results of the Chicago Primaries and the rest of Illinois. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
NOTE: With the 2026 mid-term elections drawing near, the Trump/Republican regime is trying to make sure the Republican Party maintains control of the House of Representatives and the Senate to continue their agenda.
THE BALLROOM BLITZ...
ALSO…
FACT BASED OPINION
THE JEFFREY EPSTEIN SITUATION…
*NOTE: Any possible crimes happened BEFORE his first Presidential campaign so as a potential civilian suspect, Donald Trump is NOT covered by the Supreme Court’s Presidential Immunity Ruling in The Jeffrey Epstein Situation.
MEDICAL NEWS…
FACT BASED OPINION

DEFENDING FREE SPEECH…
FACT BASED OPINION

FACT BASED OPINION
SOCIAL (IN)JUSTICE…
IT’S FACT CHECK TIME!
FACT BASED OPINION
MEANWHILE, IN CONGRESS…
*The Senate debated the Trump/Republican regime supported SAVE Act. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
ELSEWHERE…
*Opinion: Manners matter.
😀AND FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS…

ALL MEMES COURTESY OF FACEBOOK.
OTHER IMAGES VIA PUBLIC DOMAIN SOURCES.

THE PUZZLE CORNER: MARCH 21, 2026

 😎FUN FACT
The Human Liver fluctuates in size, depending upon body activity.

NUMBER PLEASE
Get ready! We ask the question, but the answer is just a number.
What number is considered unlucky in Italy?

REBUS
Something familiar is represented in the image below. Do you know what it is?

We’ll reveal all next weekend but for now, let’s open up THE ANSWERS BOX📦 and discover the results from the March 14, 2026 Puzzle Corner.

TRIVIA TIME
The Oscars were held March 15. Who has hosted the awards show the most, to date?
Comedian/actor Bob Hope with 19 events. The strongest contender, currently in second place, is comedian/actor Billy Crystal with 9 events, to date.
Oddly, neither gentleman has ever won an Oscar, although Hope has been presented a few honorary awards.

THE LETTER SHUFFLE
With Saint Patrick’s Day March 17, how many new words can you spell out of the letters in SHAMROCK?
A, ah, am, arc(s), ark(s), arm(s), as, ash
Cam(s), car(s), cash, char(s), charm(s), chaos, chasm, cram(s), crash, croak(s)
Hack(s), ham(s), harm(s), has
Mach, mack, march, mar(s), marsh, mash, mock(s)
Oak(s), oar(s), oh, or
Rack(s), rah (which is an old cheer word), ram(s), rash, roach, roam(s), rock(s)
Sack, scam, scar, scram, sham, shack, shark, shock, soak, soar
More than the 70 listed above might be possible.

Tuesday, March 17, 2026

MY FIRST "LAST KISS"

 Fellow writer John Lustig bought the rights to the defunct Charlton Comics line of romance comics and along with other public domain material, turned it into a long running gag feature called Last Kiss, that can be found on Go Comics and other places, including his website.

Guess who's Saint Patrick's Day🍀 joke was published today?

That's right. MINE! 😎

Can you tell I'm more than a little excited about all of this right now?😉 My first foray into the comics as a contributor.

It's kind of like finding the proverbial pot of gold at the end of the rainbow🌈 or winning the lottery.

Hopefully in time as my muse and John's sense of humor permits, I'll have another gag or three to share with the world but between now and then, I urge everyone who needs a good laugh (especially nowadays) to visit Last Kiss on a regular basis for a little stress relief.

Lee Houston, Junior
Editor-In-Chief, The Free Choice E-zine.

Sunday, March 15, 2026

SUNDAY FUNNIES: LARRY THE LEPRECHAUN CELEBRATES SAINT PATRICK'S DAY

 I'm a tad early because March 15 is the closest Sunday Funnies to March 17 this year, but HAPPY SAINT PATRICK'S DAY me fine lads and lasses.
Hope none of ye are superstitious about this being the Ides of March.
If ye are, just don't have a Caesar's Salad today. 😉

Anyway, besides honoring the Patron Saint of the Emerald Isle, March 17 is also Saint Gertude's Day.
Patrick may have driven the snakes out of Ireland, and I haven't seen any of those reptiles around lately meself, Gertude is the Patron Saint of Cats🐱, but please don't call her a crazy cat lady.

In any event Larry the Leprechaun here, pausing to celebrate with everyone as part of all the events on me long agenda.

If any of you are wondering, leprechauns are lucky, under certain circumstances. But ever since that one bloke hooked up with that cereal company, the rest of us can't come right out and call ourselves lucky any more.

Anyway, whether you prefer cats🐱 or shamrocks🍀, on Saint Patrick's Day even those who cannot claim any ancestry to the Emerald Isle be Irish as we honor the great Saint Patrick himself. You'll have to talk to whoever is in charge of calendars to find out why Gertude doesn't even get mentioned.
That doesn't sound fair to me.

While the day first began as a purely religious observance during Lent, it has certainly grown beyond anyone's imagination to become a holiday of anything and everything Irish, whether it be legend or fact.
However, that doesn't prevent me from telling everyone some fine Irish inspired humor.

What's Irish and stays outside in your yard all the time?
Patty O'Furniture.

Why did good Saint Patrick drive the snakes🐍 out of Ireland?
Because it was too far for them to walk.

Why should you never iron a four leaf clover?
Because ye don't want to press your luck.

What do you call a fake stone in Ireland?
A sham rock.
Of course music wise, some of us leprechauns really like shamrock and roll🎵.

What kind of bow cannot be tied?
A rainbow.🌈

What does it mean when you find a horseshoe?
Some poor horse🐎 is walking around bare foot!

Why do frogs🐸 love Saint Patrick's Day?
Because they're already green.

And now, before I must part company with all ye fine people, let me pause to wish everyone the best in life. Until we meet again...

May the road rise up to meet ye to ease your travels
May the wind always be at your back to make the journey quicker
May the sun shine warm upon your face to make your trip more comfortable
May the rains fall softly upon your fields to make your crops more bountiful.
May a rainbow always follow the rain.
May your needs never meet lack.
And may the hand of a friend always be within reach.

HAPPY SAINT PATRICK'S DAY!
HAPPY SAINT GERTUDE'S DAY!

If you're able to do so, please party responsibly and safely.
Then again, while alcohol isn't needed to do so,
life should be celebrated EVERY day!


(All links were active at the time of posting.)

Saturday, March 14, 2026

THE WEEK IN REVIEW: MARCH 8-14, 2026: NEWS HIGHLIGHTS

 
WEAR A MASK😷 WHEN NECESSARY
& BEWARE ANY VERSION OF

MARCH IS WOMEN’S HISTORY MONTH.
MARCH 14 IS PI 𝝅DAY. (3.14)
MARCH 15 IS WORLD SHEEP🐑 DAY.
MARCH 15 ALSO MARKS THE 70TH ANNIVERSARY OF
MY FAIR LADY’S BROADWAY DEBUT.
MARCH 16 IS PANDA🐼 DAY.
MARCH 17 IS SAINT PATRICK’S DAY🍀, SAINT GERTUDE'S DAY 😸
& THE UNIFICATION OF ITALY DAY.
MARCH 18 IS THE 45TH ANNIVERSARY OF THE GREATEST AMERICAN HERO.
MARCH 21 IS INTERNATIONAL FORESTS🌲🌳 DAY, WORLD POETRY DAY
& WORLD DOWN SYNDROME AWARENESS DAY.
MARCH 22 IS WORLD WATER DAY.
MARCH 23 IS PUPPY DAY.
MARCH 24 IS WORLD TUBERCULOSIS AWARENESS DAY.

AMONGST EVENTS AROUND THE WORLD THIS PAST WEEK…
SWITZERLAND'S POV
*The reported COVID state of the world, as of March 14, 2026. But why has there been no data from the United States since January 21, 2025???
*March 18 marks the 260th anniversary of Great Britain repealing the Stamp Act.


IN THE MIDDLE EAST…
*Concerning Israel, Palestine, Hamas, Hezbollah, the Gaza Strip and more. (There are 4/FOUR separate links in this item.)
*Trump won't provide escorts, but has ordered US military forces to open the Strait of Hormuz. Yet that will be a very difficult task. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)

THE RUSSIA UKRAINE WAR!

THE TERRORIST REPORT…

*The Free Choice E-zine does not support terrorism, no matter what the “cause” or alleged “justification”. Thus we will only be posting news items in this section whenever terrorists are brought to justice through arrest and trial.

HELPING WILDLIFE
🌐THE CLIMATE CHANGE CHRONICLES…
*March 15 is World Sheep🐑 Day.
*March 16 is Panda🐼 Day.
*Marcy 21 is International Forests🌲🌳 Day.
*March 22 is World Water Day.

🌌SPACE NEWS...
*Sadly, March 23 is the 25th anniversary of losing the MIR Space Station.

😢PASSING PARADE…
*2003 Nobel Prize winner Sir Anthony Leggett has passed away.
*Tommy DeCarlo of Boston is no longer with us.
*Former professional football🏈 player Matt Snell has passed away.
*Former professional baseball⚾ player Gary Wagner is no longer with us.
*Country Joe McDonald of Country Joe and the Fish has passed away.
*Actor Cory Parker (Will and Grace, other shows) has taken his last bow on life’s stage.

WITHIN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…


WE NEED MORE
GUN RESPONSIBILITY
NOW!

ALL INEQUALITY HAS TO STOP!

BAN BOOK BANS!

POLITICALLY…
ON FOREIGN ISSUES…
*Speculation: Do Republicans suffer from Islamophobia??? Apparently at least one does. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Trump won't provide escorts, but has ordered US military forces to open the Strait of HormuzYet that will be a very difficult task. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
*Opinion: The spinning PR.
*Speculation: Is anyone profiting from the war??? Is the US over rising oil prices??? Intentionally???(There are 3/THREE separate links in this item.)
*Speculation: When will the war be over??? "When I feel it in my bones."—Trump. (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
THE TRUMP TARIFF TURMOIL AND THE ECONOMY…
*Nintendo is suing for their Tariff refund. So is Trump's shoe supplier! (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
ON IMMIGRANT ISSUES…
ON DOMESTIC ISSUES...
THE 2026 MID-TERM ELECTIONS…
FACT BASED OPINION

*Opinion: A campaign issue???
*Opinion: Despite its pro-Republican gerrymandering, why Texas could go Democratic this November.
NOTE: With the 2026 mid-term elections drawing near, the Trump/Republican regime is trying to make sure the Republican Party maintains control of the House of Representatives and the Senate to continue their agenda.
THE BALLROOM BLITZ...
ALSO…
THE JEFFREY EPSTEIN SITUATION…
WILL TRUMP TESTIFY???
*NOTE: Any possible crimes happened BEFORE his first Presidential campaign so as a potential civilian suspect, Donald Trump is NOT covered by the Supreme Court’s Presidential Immunity Ruling in The Jeffrey Epstein Situation.
FACT BASED OPINION
MEDICAL NEWS…
DEFENDING FREE SPEECH…
SOCIAL (IN)JUSTICE…
FACT BASED OPINION

*Opinion: The end of the Trans Community???  (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
IT’S FACT CHECK TIME!
*Trump on the Iran War. But is he lying???  (There are 2/TWO separate links in this item.)
MEANWHILE, IN CONGRESS…
ELSEWHERE…

😀AND FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS…

ALL MEMES COURTESY OF FACEBOOK.